Just That Time of the Month

Dear Mother Nature,


Can you stop being a
bipolar
slightly schizophrenic
estrogen-filled
menstrual
crazy bitch

Get up off
your high horse, set on
that nimbus cloud
which you ride upon,
waving to royal
subjects with a flick of
your wrist
and make these gale force
hurricane winds which
are ruining me now
simply cease
& desist

Is it that
time of the month
when your
visitor comes?
Have monsoons bursted
right through your
Tampax corridor
to pour
onto humans a
continuous flood?

Will it drown all
herbivores & innocent
stray kittens in the
street,
overflowing soil from
the river to every
ever-rolling valley, it's not
nourishing when
you rain gratuitous, these crops
runneth over
too much of a good thing,
does more
damage than
Immigration policies did
to the state of
Arizona

What's your forecast?
I'll chart a timetable
in reply of how this life
between you & I
could shakedown if you
take me back,
oh damn no honey- your ass
doesn't look any fatter
in those pants
than it does on the average...
Wait, that came out bad-
hon, I did not mean it
like that!

You were just fiery,
now you've gotten frigid
once soft-spoken,
flip a switch- then you get
rigid, this
hot & cold game
has me losing control
of internal thermostat
at first I suffered
heat stroke,
but now I'm struck
by hypothermia

Can you please
tone it down
for me,
for just
one month?
Can you stick this out,
are you feeling gentle
or vigilant,
your constant
mood-swinging has had you
acting quite
drugged

Can we go back
to how
we used to be, before
World War III,
and gas emissions came
to disrupt our
ecological harmony?
before the Springtime climate
hit temps of
113
& wintertime didn't make
me desperate
to wind forward both my
hourglass and
clock's speed

Let's just work
this out
so we can both be happy
as when we started
this Marriage was
a solstice of
flawless conditions
back in our
Honeymoon phase

Let's go back to
those days!

I cannot exist
without you,
We are tied like
grapes to the vine-
I may keep growing, but
with the sweet flesh
of fruit lost, what's the
reason if I'm
only wasting my climb

Let's talk this out,
this is illogical
it's hard, but we can
patch things up, at least
be civil for the kids,
make the best of this for
our family
so every season year 'round
doesn't crumble,
let's kiss and make up,
and once again
make this union
one of
good company

I still stay awake
to watch the early Sun rise,
and every single time
I do,
I think of you

Don't tell me it doesn't matter,
to agree to disagree
& part ways,
it's meaningless-
you know this isn't true,
and how can
I exist,
when in this universe-
all this man ever
needed was
you

A forecast severe,
with signs of incoming
inclement weather
can we brave the storms
together?
I never meant to crack
jokes, I know
you're sensitive, with the
changes you've
been going through
and yes, I sense
you're feeling tender,
but as your eyes
are parting,
the skies will darken
to coincide with my
sense of stubborn pride
we'll share this life,
or I swear right now
I'll give right up,
& just buy my coffin

I'll give my all
to prove
you are the reason
this blood-pumper still
ticks,
yeah I move for you
and when all this is through
just know there's nothing
that I wouldn't do

I need to feel
you, I
miss you terribly
I freeze,
and lose all track of
myself when
I have you nowhere near
my side

I'll stop the world
to bring you back, yes
I
love you dearly,
I'll always be near
counting the days



Signed yours
Sincerely,

—Father Time












(c) Paul LaTorre 2010